After twenty-four consecutive days of blogging, I allowed Day 25 to go postless.
I will not try to excuse the lapse.
I will, however, explain that just as I was ready to begin posting, my laptop slipped off the wireless network and refused to respond to multiple resettings of both the adapter and the router. The little box on the screen claimed the settings saved on the laptop didn’t match those of the network.
For the next little while, we engaged in vigorous dispute. If computers could speak, it would translate to something like this:
Me: Do too.
Box: Do not.
Me: Do too.
Box: Do not.
And so on until nearly midnight. By that time, I was tired and not about to start over at the desktop upstairs. I powered down and went to bed.
The last thing I saw before the screen fell dark was poor, faithful Norton, his little black and gray bars frantically scan-scan-scanning, trying to update security over a connection that no longer existed. I told him over and over to cancel, but he ignored my pleas. Norton is a perfectionist. He can’t tolerate failure.
I don’t like to fail either. Never have. In fact, I used to be a human Norton, processing, processing, processing, never secure.
Several years ago, however, while reading one of the many self-help books perfectionism required, I came across the following sentence: “The cup is already broken.”
That was a revelation. Nothing is perfect; it wasn’t, isn’t, won’t be perfect.
I adopted the idea. Sometimes I remember to act on it. I relax; do what I can as best I can; stop running as fast as I can to stay in the same place; stop trying to do the impossible. I accept the perfection of imperfection.
Now, this brings us back to NaBloPoMo.
On September 1, I promised myself that I would post every day this month. For twenty-four days, I did that. Some days I managed only a quotation, but I did what I set out to do.
Until Day 25, when I failed.
In light of that failure, I consider my options.
Do I blush, close my laptop, and steal away, never to return?
Do I follow the example of the Texas Legislature when it misses a deadline, and pretend it’s still yesterday?
Nope. I say, “The cup is already broken.”
I missed one day. The month is not November, and blog posting is not brain surgery.
I messed up.
PS The solution, if anyone is interested: The wireless button on the front of the laptop was turned off. My husband discovered that after an hour or so of performing Saturday-afternoon tech support. I didn’t know there was a wireless button. I regret putting my husband to all that unnecessary trouble. I will make amends.
But aside from that, so what?